Life in certain countries can be really devastating. It often come to the point when most people waking up everyday to nothing. No hope, no where to go, no one there who can show them better way, no job and no promised meal of the day. Worst of all they are fearful to dream. Life in Third World or Developing countries can be really challenging and oppressing. As what we all know of, the rich will keep getting richer while the poor will keep going from bad to worst. It's when life has become a living nightmare. I've spend 10 months of my life in one of the African countries. A country where you can really see how the poor and the rich are noticeably divided. The area where the riches live in, the poor should just stay away. Justice haven't really found it's meaning yet here. Some people went into prison for no real convictions while some people went in because they were paid off by the real culprit who happened to be wealthy. Rich people can just made up story about someone and sent them to prison if they're not happy with them.
The issue I wanted to share here are issues that touched girls and women there. For sure nobody really know how many girls are forced into child marriage and it is often to men double or triple their age! For once I know, most girls does not have enough or fair value here. Why would I say so? I experienced it with a young man. (my driver while I was there) One day he was so happy to inform me that he's getting married soon. I was happy for him so we talked about it. To my surprised it was real what we heard or read somewhere. He bought a cow for the girl's family. Of course I'm not saying all family doing it but the one in rural area still highly practicing it. Girl's father demanded for things according to the value they put on their daughters. If their daughter ever went to school they will ask for something they think worth it. The education level applies to what they asked for too. Some asked for one goat, some asked for heard of goats, a cow or few cows and some other things which can be use to feast the village for that wedding. Come on! I might not say it right & I know many will disagree with me but this is how I viewed it. Don't you think the girl is equivalent to a cow? Remember everyone tells a story their own way. This is my way of telling this story.
Come on! For your information, they are still too many girls here denied educations. They can't go to school because they need to help their mother to fetch water. They can't go to school because they need to help look after the younger ones in the family. They can't go to school because their parents can't afford it. They can't go to school because their parents say let the boys go to school, they will be someone one day and girls doesn't need to learn from school how to cook or clean the house. So that's what girls are for. Cooking, washing, cleaning and enslaved to the house chores and her family. Not to deny why many young girls are married off by their parents at such a young age. They said they can't afford to take care of her and if she's married, her husband will feed her and take care of her. Really? That's where I even read a write up a while ago about domestic violence in such marriage. A marriage that consist of young girls with her older husband, can be double to triple her age. According to the person who wrote it, girls in these marriage, they can't fight their husband even if he beat her because of his status as head of the family. He can beat her if she refuse sexual intercourse. (Do you know there's an Act protecting rape in marriage?) Whenever she don't want, that mean it's by force. She got beaten if she served meals late for her husband! Imagine that!! Basically it is "The husband marry them, feed them and they must obey to every of their demand. Be it wrong or not!!" Wow! This is really still happening. They will not protest because they are told by their parents- must obey husband. I think this is not obey, it's way beyond obey. What is marriage if only one side priority are taken care of while the other can't even speak.
Most girls and women in that country, they work like horse and they are almost not allowed to rest. If they can't work because they are not well or tired, everyone will assume they are lazy. They wake up really early to fetch water for the house and do all the house chores before they go out to do their work. Working mean every possible work available. Odd or petty works. Anything as long as they will get little paid at the end of the day. Sometimes they just stay outside office blocks or building and asked every passers by if they can help to get anything for them. They asked me if I need newspaper or anything and they can get it for me. After all you just need to give them something equivalent to RM1 here. Just give it to them, they will say so many thank you and God bless you. They stays outside sometimes from 7am to 7pm late in the evening to look for the little money they can so they can bring it home. During some unfaithful days they might ended up getting nothing despite the 12 hours being outside beating some harsh weather.
They sell groundnuts, cassava, breads, pure water and anything else. They carry all these loads on their head. Some girls carrying their younger siblings with them while they're selling or hawking on the street because there was no one available to help taking care of them. Very common you will see women carrying their babies on their back while working. I known of one lady who is cleaning our office building then. (Of course while I was in Africa) She sweep the office, the walkway, stairs and lobby. She clean toilets on every floor. She clean windows and throw rubbish for people. That was a five storey building and she was the only person cleaning it! During lunch hour, she will asked if anyone need her to go get them lunch. She sacrificed her own lunch hour to get things for people because she knew if she did that she will get some extra money. Think about that again, people does not even respect her. I heard they called or yelled at her "You woman, come!" It was so heart breaking to know that but she seems fine. People don't even bother to ask her name because they think not worth it. She came to work with 3 children everyday. A baby that she tied on her back and another two kids perhaps age around 3 and 4. I saw her sometimes giving food to her children under the tree and I never saw her eating. I believe she might only eat once a day, maybe early in the morning before she left to work or late at night after all her work done. Is that how a woman should live? I spoke to her few time, a lot with sign language because she doesn't speak English. What I know from the girl next office is, this cleaning lady's husband died in an accident while she was still pregnant with her last born. Look below, that's how they walked about the city selling things everyday.
The issue I wanted to share here are issues that touched girls and women there. For sure nobody really know how many girls are forced into child marriage and it is often to men double or triple their age! For once I know, most girls does not have enough or fair value here. Why would I say so? I experienced it with a young man. (my driver while I was there) One day he was so happy to inform me that he's getting married soon. I was happy for him so we talked about it. To my surprised it was real what we heard or read somewhere. He bought a cow for the girl's family. Of course I'm not saying all family doing it but the one in rural area still highly practicing it. Girl's father demanded for things according to the value they put on their daughters. If their daughter ever went to school they will ask for something they think worth it. The education level applies to what they asked for too. Some asked for one goat, some asked for heard of goats, a cow or few cows and some other things which can be use to feast the village for that wedding. Come on! I might not say it right & I know many will disagree with me but this is how I viewed it. Don't you think the girl is equivalent to a cow? Remember everyone tells a story their own way. This is my way of telling this story.
Come on! For your information, they are still too many girls here denied educations. They can't go to school because they need to help their mother to fetch water. They can't go to school because they need to help look after the younger ones in the family. They can't go to school because their parents can't afford it. They can't go to school because their parents say let the boys go to school, they will be someone one day and girls doesn't need to learn from school how to cook or clean the house. So that's what girls are for. Cooking, washing, cleaning and enslaved to the house chores and her family. Not to deny why many young girls are married off by their parents at such a young age. They said they can't afford to take care of her and if she's married, her husband will feed her and take care of her. Really? That's where I even read a write up a while ago about domestic violence in such marriage. A marriage that consist of young girls with her older husband, can be double to triple her age. According to the person who wrote it, girls in these marriage, they can't fight their husband even if he beat her because of his status as head of the family. He can beat her if she refuse sexual intercourse. (Do you know there's an Act protecting rape in marriage?) Whenever she don't want, that mean it's by force. She got beaten if she served meals late for her husband! Imagine that!! Basically it is "The husband marry them, feed them and they must obey to every of their demand. Be it wrong or not!!" Wow! This is really still happening. They will not protest because they are told by their parents- must obey husband. I think this is not obey, it's way beyond obey. What is marriage if only one side priority are taken care of while the other can't even speak.
Most girls and women in that country, they work like horse and they are almost not allowed to rest. If they can't work because they are not well or tired, everyone will assume they are lazy. They wake up really early to fetch water for the house and do all the house chores before they go out to do their work. Working mean every possible work available. Odd or petty works. Anything as long as they will get little paid at the end of the day. Sometimes they just stay outside office blocks or building and asked every passers by if they can help to get anything for them. They asked me if I need newspaper or anything and they can get it for me. After all you just need to give them something equivalent to RM1 here. Just give it to them, they will say so many thank you and God bless you. They stays outside sometimes from 7am to 7pm late in the evening to look for the little money they can so they can bring it home. During some unfaithful days they might ended up getting nothing despite the 12 hours being outside beating some harsh weather.
They sell groundnuts, cassava, breads, pure water and anything else. They carry all these loads on their head. Some girls carrying their younger siblings with them while they're selling or hawking on the street because there was no one available to help taking care of them. Very common you will see women carrying their babies on their back while working. I known of one lady who is cleaning our office building then. (Of course while I was in Africa) She sweep the office, the walkway, stairs and lobby. She clean toilets on every floor. She clean windows and throw rubbish for people. That was a five storey building and she was the only person cleaning it! During lunch hour, she will asked if anyone need her to go get them lunch. She sacrificed her own lunch hour to get things for people because she knew if she did that she will get some extra money. Think about that again, people does not even respect her. I heard they called or yelled at her "You woman, come!" It was so heart breaking to know that but she seems fine. People don't even bother to ask her name because they think not worth it. She came to work with 3 children everyday. A baby that she tied on her back and another two kids perhaps age around 3 and 4. I saw her sometimes giving food to her children under the tree and I never saw her eating. I believe she might only eat once a day, maybe early in the morning before she left to work or late at night after all her work done. Is that how a woman should live? I spoke to her few time, a lot with sign language because she doesn't speak English. What I know from the girl next office is, this cleaning lady's husband died in an accident while she was still pregnant with her last born. Look below, that's how they walked about the city selling things everyday.
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| Did you see how the lady in the centre tying her baby on her body? |
That is just one of the story I can share or it will be too long as I sat at the road side with a lady selling grilled corn, I spoke to girls who's selling bread, I sat among hookers in Five Stars Hotel and many more. I just want us to be more generous with life. Stop or just please cease on complaining about every little thing that comes our way every now and then. As we complaint about one extra paperwork found on our desk this morning, think how persistent they are begging for work there. As we are complaining about the food in that restaurant too salty or tasteless, think if they have had any meal today. As we complaint that our body are too stiff and need massage, think if they have even had the chance to sit down resting for the tiny five minutes today. As we are updating status on Facebook, think if they can even read from A to Z. I'm not preaching here but if we could and allow our mind and body to be a little more adapting to life outside our comfort zone, I'm sure we are going to live better. Those are people who does not have any clue on what is there tomorrow but they never give up instead trying harder each day to live on this earth. As we are busy complaining to the left and right, you might never knew how many people are actually breathing their last breath. Complaining seldom take us to the next level, instead it might just waste our time and make us stressfully angry. Why do it then?
We have the whole world in front of us waiting to be explore. Why don't take the chance to make the best out of our life while we still can. Dreams and work on realizing it. Just know that no matter who we are, either the President of a country or just a garbage collector, we can never do enough for this life but that shouldn't stop us from trying. The smallest gesture or did can change a community or even a country. Believe that we shall all try to do some good. The enemies fight the hardest when they know God have something great for you in store so do not stop if people criticize you just once when you are trying to do something good. Have faith in God and do things sincerely from your heart.
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