Beware of Drink Spiking!!!

Hello… Do you know what is drink spiking?

Drink spiking is a crime and there are so many people out there who don’t consider it as a crime because it usually happened without violent and force. However, it’s illegal because it is done without permission from the victims. BEWARE!! Drink spiking happens when alcohol or another substance is added to your drink without you knowing. Even though drink spiking is illegal, it has occurred everywhere in the world. Drink spiking is a dangerous practice that can expose you to unsafe situations including:

• Assault

• Robbery

• Rape and sexual assault

• Unsafe sex leading to unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted disease

• Health effects of unknown drugs

• Death.

Some facts about drink spiking:

·         The majority of victims are female

·         Some victims are raped or sexually assaulted

·         Some victims have died from the effects of a spiked drink

·         Many victims knew their attacker

·         Drink spiking does not just happen to young women in their twenties—many victims are aged over 30 years

·         Alcoholic drinks are those most commonly spiked, but incidents have also included having soft drinks, tea, coffee and hot chocolate being spiked

·         Drink spiking does not just happen when drugs are added—many times it is when extra alcohol is added to your drink.

How will I know if my drink has been spiked?

Chances are you will not smell, see or taste any difference to your drink, particularly if it is spiked with alcohol and the most dangerous part is the effect occurs almost immediately. The warning signs include:

·         Feeling dizzy or faint

·         Feeling sick or sleepy

·         Feeling drunk, even if you have only had a little alcohol to drink

·         Passing out

·         Waking up feeling disoriented and sick, with memory blanks about the night before.

How can I prevent my drink being spiked?

Drink spiking happens more than you may realize. It is a growing problem around the world. Research has shown the majority of drink spiking incidents occurs in late night venues such as nightclubs. However, it can happen anywhere even at a private party. By taking some simple precautions you can protect yourself and your friends from drink spiking:

·         Be aware that drink spiking happens—in quiet premises and private parties as well as in noisy, crowded nightclubs.

·         Do not leave your drink unattended—for example when dancing, going to the toilet or becoming involved in a conversation. It only takes a second to add more alcohol or to drop in a pill or some powder.

·         Avoid sharing drinks and be wary of accepting drinks from people you do not know very well.

·         Buy your own drinks and know what you are drinking. Do not drink something you did not see poured or opened.

·         Throw away drinks that taste funny or salty.

·         Try to stick with your group. Potential offenders may try to separate you from your friends.

·         If you feel sick or dizzy ask someone you trust to take you to a safe place.

·         Look out for your friends—many people become more trusting as the night goes on

·          If you notice any change in a friend’s demeanor or behavior, report the incident immediately. Quick action may prevent a sexual assault.

·         If someone collapses and is unconscious, call an ambulance immediately—but do not leave them alone.

Teenage Pregnancies

CAUSES OF TEENAGE PREGNANCY

Teenage pregnancy is one of the most common problems that are growing worldwide. The term teenage pregnancy is being used because it refers to those who get pregnant before reaching legal adulthood. It is a condition in which the teenagers become unintentionally pregnant. There are a number of factors responsible for teenage pregnancy. This condition is most prevalent in developed countries like US, UK and others. However, the developing and under-developed countries are not left behind.

Numbers of causes are still debatable. In the developed countries, the main causes of teenage pregnancy is the result of inadequate sex education among the teenagers, alcohol abuse, sexual abuse, higher rates of poverty, lower education levels and many more. While the causes for teenage pregnancy in developing and under developed countries always resulting from financial constraints, domestic or sexual violence and child marriage are some of the factors that cause unwanted pregnancy among teenagers.

Other than those stated above, following are some of the contributing causes of teenage pregnancy:

1. Lack of Parental Guidance: Most parents evade their children from talking about sex. In some cases, they provide false information regarding sex and discourage their children to participate in any informative discussion about sex. In some cases, teenage mothers are not well educated about sex before getting pregnant and thus this leads to lack of communication between the parents and the children.

2. Adolescent Sexual Behavior: Among the adolescents, peer pressure is a major factor that encourages the teenage boys and girls to indulge in sexual activities. Early dating, as early as 12 years of age, is another factor that contributes to teen pregnancy.

3. Inadequate Knowledge about Safe Sex: Most adolescents are unaware of safe sex. They probably have no access to the traditional methods of preventing pregnancy. And the main reason behind is that they are either too embarrassed or fear to seek information about it. It was found that more than 80% of teenage pregnancies are unintended.



4. Exploitation by Older Men: This is another major factor that contributes to pregnancy among the teenagers. Those girls who date older men are more likely to become pregnant before they attain womanhood. Rape, sexual exploitations etc. also takes place that leads to unwanted pregnancy among teenage girls.

5. Socio Economic Factors: Teenage girls who belong to the poor families are more likely to become pregnant. Researchers have found that even in the developed countries teenage pregnancy occurs most commonly among the deprived sections.

These were some of the factors which are responsible for teenage pregnancy. Today the primary concern is more about the teenage mothers who becomes pregnant outside marriage. If you take a look at the teenage pregnancy statistics then you will realize the growing numbers of teenage mother all over the world. These teenage mothers are mostly school drop outs. In many cases, the teenage girls are either too shy to ask their partners to use condoms or are not willing to say no to their partners despite not willing to involve in such activities in fear of being dump by boyfriends.

Let us together stand against teenage pregnancies. Imagine a girl who have not fully develop and start having a baby. There will always be complication along the pregnancy. Let's fight "children having children" Check this link for more reading http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-11339676

Do You Notice Any of This in Your Relationship?

You may be in an abusive relationship if he or she:

·         Is jealous or possessive toward you.

·         Tries to control you by being very bossy or demanding.

·         Tries to isolate you by demanding you cut off social contacts and friendships.

·         Is violent and / or loses his or her temper quickly.

·         Pressures you sexually, demands sexual activities you are not comfortable with.

·         Abuses drugs or alcohol.

·         Claims you are responsible for his or her emotional state.

·         Blames you when he or she mistreats you.

·         Has a history of bad relationships.

·         Your family and friends have warned you about the person or told you that they are concerned for your safety or emotional well being.

·         You frequently worry about how he or she will react to things you say or do

·         Makes "jokes" that shame, humiliate or embarrass you, weather privately or around family and friends.

·         Your partner grew up witnessing an abusive parental relationship, and/or was abused as a child.

·         Your partner "rages" when they feel hurt, shame, fear or loss of control.

·         Both parties in abusive relationships may develop or progress in drug or alcohol dependence in a (dysfunctional) attempt to cope with the pain.

·         You leave and then return to your partner repeatedly, against the advice of your friends, family and loved ones.  

·         You have trouble ending the relationship, even though you know inside it's the right thing to do.  



Alternatively, ask yourself does the person you love...

·         Constantly keep track of your time?

·         Act jealous and possessive?

·         Accuse you of being unfaithful or flirting?

·         Discourage your relationships with friends and family?

·         Prevent or discourage you from working, interacting with friends or attending school?

·         Constantly criticize or belittle you?

·         Control all finances and force you to account for what you spend? (Except for reasonable cooperative household budgeting)

·         Humiliate you in front of others? (Including "nasty jokes" about you)

·         Destroy or take your personal property or sentimental items?

·         Have affairs?

·         Threaten to hurt you, your children or pets? Threaten to use a weapon?

·         Push, hit, slap, punch, kick, or bite you or your children?

·         Force you to have intercourse against your will?

Identifying Healthy and Abusive Relationship

I have feeling for this topic today so I would like to share it with all of you. It’s about Abusive relationship. Sometimes abusive relationships are easy to identify but in some situations, the abuse may take delicate forms. Some of the aspects shown below can help you to identify traits between abusive and healthy relationships. In general, abusive relationships have a serious power imbalance, with the abuser controlling or attempting to control most aspects of life. Healthy relationships share responsibility and decision-making tasks and reflect respect for all the people in the relationship, including children.

Healthy Relationships:

 

 

Non-Threatening Behavior

ü  Talking and acting so that your partner feels safe and comfortable doing and saying things.

 

Respect

ü  Listening to your partner non-judgmentally.

ü  Being emotionally affirming and understanding.

ü  Valuing opinions.

 

Trust and Support

ü  Supporting your partner’s goals in life.

ü  Respecting your partner’s right to his or her own feelings, friends, activities and opinions.

 

Honesty and Accountability

ü  Accepting responsibility for self.

ü  Admitting being wrong when it is appropriate.

ü  Communicating openly and truthfully

 

Responsible Parenting

ü  Sharing parental responsibilities.

ü  Being a positive, non-violent role model for children.

 

Shared Responsibility

ü  Mutually agreeing on a fair distribution of work.

ü  Making family decisions together.

 

Abusive Relationships:

 

 

Using Intimidation

v  Making your partner afraid by using looks, actions, gestures.

v  Smashing or destroying things.

v  Destroying or confiscating your partner's property.

v  Abusing pets as a display of power and control.

v  Silent or overt raging

v  Displaying weapons or threatening their use.

v  Making physical threats.

 

Using Emotional Abuse

v  Putting your partner down.

v  Making your partner feel bad about himself or herself.

v  Calling your partner with names.

v  Harassing or intimidating your partner.

v  "Checking up on" your partner's activities or whereabouts.

v  Humiliating your partner, weather through direct attacks or "nasty jokes".

v  Making your partner feel guilty.

 

Using Isolation

v  Controlling what your partner does, who he or she sees and talks to, what he or she reads, where he or she goes.

v  Limiting your partner’s outside involvement.

v  Demanding your partner remains home when you are not with them.

v  Cutting your partner off from prior friends, activities, and social interaction.

v  Using jealousy to justify your actions - Jealousy is the primary symptom of abusive relationships; it is also a core component of Love Addiction

 

Minimizing, Denying and Blame Shifting

v  Making light of the abuse and not taking your partner’s concerns about it seriously.

v  Saying the abuse did not happen, or wasn't that bad.

v  Shifting responsibility for your abusive behavior to your partner. (i.e: I did it because you ______.)

v  Saying your partner caused it.

 

Using Children

v  Making your partner feel guilty about the children.

v  Using the children to relay messages.

v  Using visitation to harass your partner.

v  Threatening to take the children away.

 

Using Male Privilege

v  Treating your partner like a servant.

v  Making all the big decisions.

v  Being the one to define the relationship's roles.

 

Using Economic Abuse

v  Preventing your partner from getting or keeping a job.

v  Making your partner ask for money.

v  Giving your partner an allowance.

v  Taking your partner’s money.

v  Not letting your partner know about or have access to family income

Now you will understand more about how healthy relationship should be and what are the characters that may leads to an abusive relationship. Be wise and know how to play your right part in a relationship. Treat others the way you want to be treated.

5 Most Common Types of Marriage

Dear Everyone,

    This article was taken from my magazine, True Wedding. For those who have the copy, this will refresh the topic and for those who does not have the copy, please read here. You can request the article for your reference by emailing me at elegance.we@gmail.com
    I hope you found it useful and it's really useful to identify the types of marriage you're in whether it's a Convenience, Abusive, Status, Invisible or Enduring type. It can also apply to other relationship such as dating couples. Read it on...

Low Self Esteem Symptoms

      Many times people that suffer from low self esteem are victims of child abuse, deprivation, rough past/childhood and so on….It’s apparent that low self esteem is often born during your childhood. It begins to show its self during the teenage years while the body is going through dramatic changes. Some people see the fact that they have a low level of self confidence and only low percentage of those people seek help in regards to their issue.

     Having low self esteem is lethal, WHY? Because most people don’t even realize they have low self esteem! Yes it’s true! You may be thinking “How can you not know if you have low self esteem?” Usually people with genuinely low self esteem have been born and raised with it. It just seem like another fact of life to them. This is dangerous because low self esteem is like a virus. It starts out as a single problem but it’s a perfect gateway for more problems to come in the future such as;

ü  Depression

ü  Insanity

ü  Suicidal thoughts

ü  Criminal thoughts

      You should now begin to see why low self esteem MUST BE recognized and destroyed! Here is a list of characteristics within most people that have low self esteem.

1.      Social withdrawal

2.      Anxiety and emotional stress

3.      Lack of social skills and self confidence.

4.      Depression and/or bouts of sadness

5.      Eating disorders

6.      Inability to accept compliments (rejection)

7.      An Inability to see yourself ’squarely’ – to be fair to yourself

8.      Accentuate the negative

9.      Exaggerated concern over what you imagine other people think

10.  Self neglect and simply let other people to treat you anyway they like

11.  Treating yourself and other people badly

12.  Rejection to take on challenges

13.  Reluctance to put yourself first or anywhere.

14.  Rejection to trust your own opinion

15.  Expecting little out of life for yourself